2008年12月17日 星期三

I feel hurt.

Jn said he WILL support me if needed. But is that true? I feel myself being ignore, just as nothing had happened. And now our club had fell into pieces because of me! I gained nothing in this incident and was totally sacrifice. I screw up the relationship and here is no friendship anymore. I try to face it but leaving myself afriad. I've devoted so much time in MUN and argue with parents with mun thing all the time in the past two years. And this is what it repay! Shoot! I'm deeply depressed.

I realize something. Every tectics and skills I learned and honed in my daily life maybe it just preparing for today. You will never know what will happen tomorrow, or even the next second. This trouble should be blame on me definitely but I learned something at least. Don't do anything on impulse and especially out of your emotion. That's irrational, and it backfire some time. Don't devote your own time into pursuing something that do not last long, out of your compassion or ... .... love. I'm not quite sure whether it's love, but I'm sure that it really causedme lots of trouble. That's enough. I need job, money and a stable relationship. That's all.

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